Dry grad gives me the dry heaves
Published April 19th, 2008 in culturalI saw an ad for Dry Grad in the liquor store a while back. This is where parents organize a party for their kids to celebrate graduating from high school, a party with no alcohol to protect their precious little angels from the death and destruction that awaits all who imbibe such evil toxins.
When I graduated, parents had organized transportation to a secret location (to avoid crashers) where we could all party till we puked. It was a blast, and I’ll never forget it! It seemed (and still seems) like a very fitting end to an often dry and boring, sometimes exciting, and frequently disappointing 13-year-long undertaking.
Notice, the reason why parents did this for us was to support us (as good parents should) by providing supervision and safety for what was by and large an extremely necessary release for us all. They recognized the importance and took responsibility.
What’s the reason for dry grad? Even MORE responsible parenting, you say? Not a chance! It’s simply one more lesson added on the 13 years’ worth of lessons the poor bastards are trying to celebrate the END of. Instead of supporting graduates, they are taking the opportunity to TEACH THEM SOME MORE!!!!
I’m sorry, but parents, you are seriously missing the fucking point of a GRAD PARTY!!!
If you want to sit around drinking tea tittering about Johnny’s bright future and his Honor Roll achievements, go right on ahead. But where are the responsible parents who are interested in treating their children like individuals and who care about their safety?
Well, what I was wondering was why the f**ckin’ dry grad is so freakin’ expensive?! If kids (and their parents) are so worried about tuition fees etc., splurge on the $40 bottle of hard liquor. I think I saw something like a dry grad fee of over $100/per person!
I just got some photos of someone’s dry grad - even without alcohol these kids were sitting on chairs in the back of a pick up driving down the street. So, let me see if I get this — drinking, drinking driving = bad, but not drinking, not wearing seatbelts and putting lots o people in the back of a moving vehicle = good ?!? Good grief.